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Reflections

D'vrei Torah by Rabbi Ellie Shemtov

12-Step Torah Vayeishev 5780

12/18/2019

 

Humility is not thinking less of yourself it’s thinking of yourself less

Despite how the title above might be interpreted, being humble doesn’t mean holding yourself in low esteem. It isn’t about feeling bad about or disliking yourself. It means recognizing how we all have strengths and flaws and how we are all worthy of being treated as equals.  Humility means not putting yourself above or below others.  As the 14th century Rabbi, Bahya ben Asher once said: Humility is halfway between too much pride and too little pride.

This week’s Torah portion Vayeishev begins with a not so subtle introduction to the line of Jacob – Joseph tended the flocks with his brothers (Gen. 37:2). In spite of the fact that Jacob had many children, only Joseph is mentioned by name here.  With his siblings lumped together as “his brothers,” we have the distinct impression that Joseph is Jacob’s favorite.  This sense is validated with the words: וְיִשְׂרָאֵל אָהַב אֶת־יוֹסֵף מִכָּל־בָּנָיו -- Israel (Jacob) loved Joseph best of all.  Rather than hide his feelings, Jacob also provides a visual reminder of Joseph’s favored status in the guise of a gift – a custom made ornamented coat-- a coat of many colors.

Taking advantage of his favored status Joseph snitches on his still nameless brothers, delivering “bad reports” about them to his father.  Not surprisingly, the brothers are none too pleased at Joseph’s behavior especially when he arrogantly reports his dreams to them and then to Jacob—dreams that seem to imply Joseph’s superior status.  In the first dream sheaves of grain belonging to the brothers bow down to Joseph’s sheaves and in the second the sun, moon and stars bow down to him.

The brothers’ hatred of Joseph reaches a climax when Jacob sends Joseph to check on his brothers who are pasturing a flock in Shechem.  When Joseph arrives, the brothers tear off his coat of many colors and throw him in a pit.  It will be many years before the brothers and Jacob see Joseph again.

Whether or not Jacob’s poor parenting skills paved the way for Joseph’s narcissistic mindset, it is Joseph who needs to take responsibility for his own behavior-- acknowledging a world beyond his own needs and desires.  Over the next few weeks we will watch Joseph do just that.  When he does he can’t help but find humility because humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.

Shabbat Shalom.

Ellie

12-Step Torah -- Vayetzei 5780

12/5/2019

 
I spent a lifetime in hell and it only took me twelve steps to get to heaven.

The 12-Steps were originally developed as an aid to overcoming an addiction to alcohol. The program’s success however, influenced the formation of additional groups supporting those in recovery from other addictive disorders.  The language of the steps emphasizes the presence of God – often explained as the God of our understanding or a Higher Power.  These diverse perceptions of God allow for a wide range of interpretations and religious beliefs.                                             

In this week’s Torah portion, Vayetzei Jacob, fleeing from his brother Esau, arrives “ba-makom.”  Often translated as place, makom is also another name for God.  But before we have a chance to wonder about the relevance of this name, the text informs us that it is night.  Resting his head on a stone Jacob goes to sleep. In this peaceful makom he dreams of angels going up and down a ladder extending from the earth all the way up to heaven. In the dream God informs Jacob that he and his descendants will be given the ground on which he is lying. God then promises to always protect and to always be with Jacob.  When he wakes up Jacob proclaims אָכֵן יֵשׁ יְהֹוָה בַּמָּקוֹם הַזֶּה וְאָֽנֹכִי לֹא יָדָֽעְתִּי, “Surely God is present in this place and I did not know it.” 

Rabbi Avraham Zalmans notes how a person’s qualities resemble a ladder.  Just as a ladder needs steps and a high place on which to lean, so too people require the help of steps and a high makom, a God of our understanding on which to lean.  The steps function as a barrier to prevent one from sin.  In addition, the vision of the angels ascending and descending the ladder demonstrates that the path towards God is not a straight line.  Descending – or falling -- is normal.

As perhaps the Torah’s first “12-Stepper,” Jacob makes a decision to turn his will over to the God of his understanding.  Jacob the grifter declares his yearning for a high place against which to lean.  After a lifetime living in a hell of his own making, it only took Jacob 12 steps to get to heaven.

Shabbat Shalom.

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  • April 2023
  • Calendar/Events
    • Upcoming Events
    • Full Calendar
    • B'nai Mitzvah
    • Weddings
  • Donate
    • General Donations
  • Welcome
    • About >
      • Our Rabbi
      • History >
        • History to 1985
        • RJC Centennial
        • Rabba Kaya Stern-Kaufman
        • Rabbi Emeritus Doug Weber
      • Board + Committees
  • Cemetery
    • Our Cemetery
    • Cemetery FAQ
  • Connect
    • Members Only >
      • Membership Directory
      • Committee Notes >
        • Building/House
        • Cemetery
        • Chesed
        • Communication
        • Community Outreach
        • Endowment Reports
        • Events
        • Ritual
        • Slate of Officers
      • Meeting Minutes
      • Budgets
      • Nisan Yahrzeits
      • Yahrzeits
    • Application for Membership
    • Directions
    • New to RJC?
  • Education
    • Rabbi Shemtov Reflections
    • Rutland Raps
    • Youth Education
    • Adult Education
    • B'nai Mitzvah
  • Contact Us