This week's Torah portion, Bechukotai, the last portion in the book of Leviticus, contains what are called the Tochecha, verses of rebuke.  These verses, which are chanted quickly and in a low voice, contain some pretty difficult stuff – curses heaped upon the Israelites if they do not follow God's laws.  The curses include things like sowing seed to no avail and making the land desolate.  While the list goes on and on, today I can't help but notice one particular curse that will befall the Israelites if they fail to follow God's laws.

I will let loose wild beasts against you and they shall bereave you of your children (Lev. 26:22).

What precisely are the sins committed that would bring on this particular curse is difficult to fathom.  But today, two days after yet another mass shooting in an elementary school – Senator Chris Murphy of Connecticut made the case for the sin of doing nothing when he said to his colleagues:

"Why do you spend all this time running for the United States Senate – why do you go through all the hassles of getting this job, of putting yourself in a position of authority – if your answer is that, as this slaughter increases, as our kids run for their lives, we do nothing?"

Elie Wiesel once wrote, "What hurts the victim most is not the cruelty of the oppressor, but the silence of the bystander."  Even worse is when those silent bystanders are many of our elected officials, whose job it is to take action.  To them I say, "No more silence.  End gun violence."

​Shabbat Shalom.

Ellie

​When all else fails follow directions

I sometimes joke that I am good at following directions. For the most part this is a true​ statement, although I have to admit when I joke about it, that often means I’d rather ignore the instructions given to me. It’s also true that every once in a while that joke morphs into a twinge of rebelliousness.  When that happens I typically do not follow directions.

But joking or not, for the most part I’m ok with it.  For instance, if I purchase an item that includes written instructions, I will read them to make sure I understand how to put together or operate what I just purchased.  If I am filling out a form or an application, I will also take care to properly fill out the information required. And…… if the governor instructs me to wear a mask in order to keep others around me safe, I’m on it. 

In this week’s Torah portion Chukat, we read:
וַיָּבֹ֣אוּ בְנֵֽי־יִ֠שְׂרָאֵ֠ל כָּל־הָ֨עֵדָ֤ה מִדְבַּר־צִן֙ בַּחֹ֣דֶשׁ הָֽרִאשׁ֔וֹן וַיֵּ֥שֶׁב הָעָ֖ם בְּקָדֵ֑שׁ וַתָּ֤מָת שָׁם֙ מִרְיָ֔ם וַתִּקָּבֵ֖ר שָֽׁם:  וְלֹא־הָ֥יָה מַ֖יִם לָֽעֵדָ֑ה
Then came the people of Israel, the whole congregation, into the desert of Zin in the first month; and the people abode in Kadesh; and Miriam died there, and was buried there.
And there was no water for the congregation.

In one verse Miriam dies and in the next the Israelites are without water.  The rabbis surmised this must mean water is connected to Miriam --- that the water the Israelites enjoyed in the desert was due to the merit of Miriam who watched over her infant brother Moses floating down the Nile in a basket.  Now that she has died, there is no more water.  The Israelites are worried and that leads to complaining.

Moses and Aaron as usual, take the complaints of the people to God, expecting God to yet again rail against the Israelites. Instead, God simply tells Moses to take his rod, gather the community and in front of them, order the rock to burst forth with water. 

It looks like Moses is going to follow God’s instructions, but then instead of speaking to the rock he speaks to the Israelites and says: Listen you rebels, shall we get water for you out of this rock? (Num. 20:10) Then, rather than speak to the rock he hits it.  So, not only does Moses not follow God’s directions, he seems to imply that he and his brother Aaron rather than God are responsible for procuring water from the rock.

If I choose to ignore instructions that will help me put together a bed frame or a lamp, there’s a good chance both the frame and the lamp will never function properly.  If I don’t fill out a college application form according to instructions, there’s a good chance I will not be considered by that college.  If I hadn’t followed the Governor’s instructions and chose to not wear a mask this past year, there may have been a chance I would have helped to spread COVID.

When Moses chooses to ignore God’s instructions, the Israelites are not punished for Moses’ actions. They do get the water they so desperately need.  However, God tells Moses that because he and Aaron did not trust God enough to affirm God’s sanctity in the sight of the Israelite people, neither he nor his brother will be allowed to enter the Promised Land.

Whatever Moses was trying to accomplish by hitting the rock, his plan backfired.  Being denied entry into the Land of Israel was a high price to pay for his actions.  Moses learned a little too late that when all else fails follow directions.
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If you are interested in learning more about Moses hitting the rock, come and join us for Shabbat services this Friday evening at 7:30pm.

Shabbat Shalom,

​Ellie

Time Takes Time

Behaviors cultivated over many years are hard to change.  In order to transform our lives, it is necessary to overcome what psychologist Dr. Jennifer Kunst calls a misconception – the belief that we need the very thing we are trying to give up.  An alcoholic has to overcome the belief that he or she needs a drink and victims of physical abuse need to overcome the belief that they need their abuser.

Even when we know our behavior needs to change we tend to resist that change.  As Dr. Kunst writes: the mind is like a rubber band; you can easily stretch it temporarily, but it snaps back to its resting position. We resist change. We like to believe that continuing to do what we’ve always done will keep us safe, while changing our behavior could put us in danger.

In this week’s Torah portion, Bamidbar, the first portion in the book of Numbers, the Israelites are themselves in the midst of a behavioral change.   After experiencing the events at Sinai they are now transitioning to the daily routines necessary for wandering through the wilderness.  In this week’s portion that means organizing into a military camp as a way to face the dangers they might come upon during their journey.

Later in the Book of Numbers the Israelites will find it more difficult to adapt to the harsh wilderness and loudly state their desire to go back to Egypt:   

 וְלָמָ֣ה יְ֠יָ֠ מֵבִ֨יא אֹתָ֜נוּ אֶל־הָאָ֤רֶץ הַזֹּאת֙ לִנְפֹּ֣ל בַּחֶ֔רֶב נָשֵׁ֥ינוּ וְטַפֵּ֖נוּ יִהְי֣וּ לָבַ֑ז הֲל֧וֹא ט֦וֹב לָ֖נוּ שׁ֥וּב מִצְרָֽיְמָה:   וַיֹּֽאמְר֖וּ אִ֣ישׁ אֶל־אָחִ֑יו נִתְּנָ֥ה רֹ֖אשׁ וְנָשׁ֥וּבָה מִצְרָֽיְמָה:
And why has the Lord brought us to this land, to fall by the sword, that our wives and our children should be a prey? were it not better for us to return into Egypt? And they said one to another, Let us choose a chief, and let us return to Egypt. (Num. 14:3-4)
 
As the Life Recovery Bible notes: All of us wish that our recovery would involve a dramatic escape from slavery and immediate entrance into the Promised Land. We would love to leave out the wilderness experiences in between. But growth and recovery occur within the wilderness. It is in the wilderness that we come to terms with who we really are. 

Even after Sinai and the receiving of the Ten Commandments, the Israelites still struggle to overcome the very thing they are trying to give up—Egypt.  But that’s ok because time takes time.

Shabbat Shalom,

​Ellie

I thank you for my life, body and soul
Help me realize I am beautiful and whole
I’m perfect the way I am and a little broken too
I will live each day as a gift I give to you
  
Written by Dan Nichols, this song Asher Yatzar (He Who Has Fashioned), is a commentary on a daily prayer of the same name:

Blessed are You our God, Sovereign of the universe, who fashioned people with wisdom, and created within them many openings and many cavities. It is obvious and known before Your throne of glory, that if but one of them were to be ruptured, or but one of them were to be blocked, it would be impossible to survive and to stand before You. Barukh Ata Adonai rofeh khol basar u’mafli la’asot -- Blessed are You God, who heals all flesh and acts wondrously.

Expressing thanks for the continued functioning of our bodies that allows us to awaken on any particular day, this prayer Asher Yatzar acknowledges gratefulness to God for the gift of life.  The song Asher Yatzar also acknowledges God for our lives, our bodies, our souls.  But it doesn’t stop there--  I’m perfect the way I am and a little broken too.  In other words, my body may ache, I may need to lose a few pounds, I may have a blemish somewhere, but I’m perfect the way I am.  

There’s a saying in the 12 Step/recovery community; progress not perfection.  Not only aren’t we perfect but perfection just isn’t the goal.  Perfection is elusive but it doesn’t matter.  I’m perfect the way I am and a little broken too.  Perfection includes being partly broken.

In their book The Spirituality of Imperfection, Ernest Kurtz and Katherine Ketcham write: Spirituality’s first step involves facing [one’s] self squarely, seeing one’s self as one is: mixed up, paradoxical, incomplete, and imperfect.  Flawed-ness is the first fact about human beings

In this week’s Torah portion Emor, we find a somewhat different approach to perfection —at least when it comes to the priesthood.   Also called Torat Kohanim, the priest’s manual, Emor describes the priestly lifestyle, one which through their various ritual obligations and restrictive way of life, sets priests apart from the rest of the Israelites.  But even among the priests not everyone is created equal when it comes to those ritual obligations.

No man of your offspring throughout the ages who had a defect shall be qualified to offer the food of his God……no man who is blind or lame, or has a limb too short or too long. No man who has a broken leg or a broken arm, or who is hunchback or a dwarf, or who has a growth in his eye….. shall be qualified to offer God’s gift…….he shall not enter or come behind the curtain or come near the altar, for he has a defect. (Lev. 21:16-21)

Wow!  I find these verses to be a bit troubling.  It’s troubling enough that one has to be born into the priesthood in order to be a priest but to then be rejected because of characteristics over which one has no control is even more troubling.  And to add insult to injury, priests are required to adhere to strict rules of conduct.   For instance, they cannot marry a divorcee, shave any part of their heads, cut the side-growth of their beard, or make gashes in their flesh.

Now, it’s true that even in our day there are many professions with strict rules of entry – jockeys for example can’t weigh more than 126 lbs. in order to compete in the Kentucky Derby.   To be a pilot in the Air Force ROTC you have to have a standing height of 64 to 77 inches and a sitting height of 34 to 40 inches.  But these are really requirements they are not defects.   
 
In our society we frown on discriminating against those with certain blemishes or defects.  In fact, we have laws that protect this type of discrimination and yet the desire and the pressure we place on achieving perfection while not established as law, is no less prevalent than it was in the days of the Kohanim. Today we hear for instance about the pressure to be thin, the pressure to have a perfect nose, the pressure to be wrinkle-free.  

The rabbis like to explain away this section of the Torah by reminding us that a Kohen not only represented the people to God but God to the people.  In presenting God to the people it was essential that the priest be “perfect” both spiritually and physically.  But this kind of perfection just doesn’t resonate so well to our modern ears.  Our modern ears hear instead how God doesn’t demand perfection from us-- how God instead demands we be the best we can be- no more no less.  Truthfully, being our best is hard enough.  Being our best is a daily struggle.

Progress not perfection.

Former Commissioner of Baseball Francis T. Vincent, Jr. once said:  Baseball teaches us, or has taught most of us, how to deal with failure.  We learn at a very young age that failure is the norm in baseball and, precisely because we have failed, we hold in high regard those who fail less often – those who hit safely in one out of three chances and become star players.  I also find it fascinating that baseball, alone in sport, considers errors to be part of the game, part of its rigorous truth.

Progress not perfection.  In Leonard Cohen’s classic song Anthem, he clearly references this week’s Torah portion and priestly perfection in presenting an offering to God, by reminding us how our imperfections help us to become the best we can be:

Ring the bells that still can ring,
Forget your perfect offering,
There is a crack in everything,
That’s how the light gets in.
 
Shabbat Shalom.

Ellie

You don’t think your way into a new kind of living.  You live your way into a new kind of thinking
 
When it comes to addictions, it isn’t enough to turn away from drinking and drugs.  Without working on the underlying issues that triggered this behavior, there is a good chance a person in recovery will relapse. According to choice theory developed in 1996 by psychologist William Glasser, human beings have direct control over the acting and thinking components of their behavior. For example, a person in recovery can choose to behave according to how they are feeling in the moment or they can choose to behave counter to what their mood might impel them to do.  They can choose to do what they want to do or they can choose to do what they need to do.

The second of this week’s double Torah portion Tazria/Metzora, introduces the notion of a ritual for purifying and reintegrating a metzora, someone recovering from tzara'at, from a skin disease.  Before conducting the ritual, the priest would visit the metzora in order to verify whether he or she had recovered.  A ritual sacrifice was then performed after which the individual was allowed to re-enter the camp.
 
The Talmud lists seven reasons why someone might be afflicted with tzara’at, one of which is gossip.  This understanding also comes from the Book of Numbers, when Miriam is afflicted with tzara’at after she and her brother Aaron gossip about Moses’ wife Tzipporah.  A Midrash even connects the word metzora with the phrase motzi shem ra, someone guilty of slander or libel.  
 
According to the Ma’ayan Ha-Hokhmah, Rabbi Abraham Kalmanakes, when the evil urge tempts you to sin, God’s expectation is for you to basically apply choice theory and behave in a way counter to what your mood might impel you to do.  God expects you to perform the mitzvah that is the opposite of the sin.  If for instance gossip is what caused one to become a metzora it isn’t enough to just stop gossiping.  It isn’t enough to merely avoid gossiping.  It is necessary to take a positive action and show for example, love to the person about whom one gossiped.
 
This past year we have all gotten very creative in how we approach each passing day.  Whether we distract ourselves with TV, movies, jigsaw puzzles, house cleaning, exercise, or zoom events, each of us in our own unique way, has adjusted, adapted, or simply put up with this new way of living. Like the recovering alcoholic who chooses to do what they need to do and not what they want to do; or the metzora who stops gossiping and shows love to the person they harmed, we have also learned not to think our way into a new kind of living, but instead, live our way into a new kind of thinking.
 
Shabbat Shalom!

Ellie